Hallmark movies. You love them or you hate them. Or you just watch them to make fun of them. Or all of the above.

My brilliant roommate Lynn (name changed, once again, to protect the innocent) is one of those few people who can be opinionated without being mean about it. In fact, she manages to make her thoughts and opinions a delight to listen to. Tonight she briefly mentioned her opinion on Hallmark movies.

“My mother and I watch them occasionally. They’re ‘feel-good’ movies—but they’re completely unrealistic. I mean, they’re always about some girl who’s dating a nice, mentally and financially stable guy but dumps him for the dirt-poor but free-spirited barista.”

“Barista?” I say.

“In this one movie, the career girl falls for a guy who runs a coffee shop—except he’ll only sell a patron what he thinks they need. Like, she’ll say she wants a caramel macchiato and he says ‘no way you’re a chai latte kinda girl.’”

“Weird. But cool.”

“I know, right? Sure, if they get married they’ll have nothing to live on; but, hey, they’ve got love!

I laughed. “Love and caffeine. Perfect combination.” Sarcasm, drip drip.

“And of course the girl’s always some driven tightwad—and she falls for the boy because he teaches her how to ‘enjoy life.’” She rolled her eyes dramatically, indulging in a set of massive air quotes.

“Go figure!” I said. “Isn’t it usually the other way around? I mean, in all the relationships I’ve seen (at least serious ones), it’s the girl who’s bright and happy and is bending over backwards to get her man to loosen up and stop taking himself and everything else so stinkin’ seriously!”

We both laughed at that one. It seems that all of our guy friends are even bigger drama queens than we are—or at least more than I am.

“For once, I’d like to see a movie where the girl sticks with the steady, stable, good-‘ol-joe kind of guy!” Lynn concluded, shaking her head emphatically.

You and me both, Lynn. You and me both.