Where in the world do they grow turkeys so big? Major League Baseball has got to have a hand in beefing up these ostriches. I mean, the drum sticks are bigger than my thighs and you can park your car under those wings! Scary.

My mind goes back to my first encounter with this 87 pound mutant at Vons. It was rock hard. Frozen solid. Should’ve gone bowling with it, but decided to bring it home to start the thawing process, which takes just under six months. Before roasting, the bird needs a thorough washing and for someone to reach into it’s mouth and retrieve the giblets (I know it’s not really the turkey’s mouth, it just makes me feel better to call it that). The giblets are conveniently in a paper pouch. Every year I wonder how and why the turkey swallowed a bag of giblets…

Many people boil the giblets in water. This shouldn’t be, folks. Giblets should be buried in the earth, never to be seen again! Or fed to the neighbor’s cat. But no, we somehow include them in our feast.

Another interesting thing one will find in the turkey’s “mouth” is it’s neck. Great place for a neck! I pull this thing out and wonder if the turkey is somehow evolving into a giraffe. This often finds its way into the boiling water with the giblets.

Many hours later, we eat. And no one thinks about the mutant bird. No one worries about the giblets or the 27 inch neck. You sit, enjoy the food, enjoy one another, and thank the Lord for His goodness. What a great holiday!

Happy Thanksgiving!